Learning to let go

Have you every had to say goodbye to a close friend?

Have you ever had to part with things that you unknowingly attached sentimental value?

Have you ever had to make the decision to downsize because you have more things than your house can reasonably accommodate?

All of these situations are difficult…at first. But when you realize that the problem is in your perspective alone, it makes it a much simpler problem to overcome.

One of my biggest learning moments was when a friend that I had really connected with at a spiritual level had to leave the country for a new opportunity. It took me about six months to adjust to the change (there was a huge void in my life). I missed her a lot. She was the one friend that just got me. I don’t connect very easily with people at that level, so it hurt. But in the process of adjusting and reflecting on my emotions, I learned that I had gotten too attached to her and the idea of her. I had to accept that the strong connection that we had built would cross all barriers including the physical distance. I had to accept that she was a blessing and that she would always be that special friend. Once I could accept that, it was freeing. Now, I still feel the same connection to her even if we don’t talk for say, a month. I call her my “Soul Sister”. But when we do talk, it’s as though we were never apart!

In many ways, it prepared me for my kids becoming teenagers. You have to accept that they will start developing their own schedules, friends and interests. They won’t always come running to you to give you a big hug when you get home as they did when they were toddlers. This doesn’t mean that they love you any less – it just means the relationship is evolving and looks different. They show their love in different ways. The key is that you need to recognize that and more importantly be secure about that.

Now the easier part. Letting go of “stuff”. I personally don’t get attached to “stuff” and I keep purchases to a minimum but not everyone I know shares the same philosophy. Their choices sometimes leaves me in a situation of saying “Gosh, why do we need so much stuff?”. Seriously, why??!!

It has created more stress for me than pleasure. Long story short…it’s time to let go.

My husband and I watched a very interesting documentary on Netflix called “Minimalism” which really provides a lot of good insight into the benefits of simplicity. That was the trigger that he needed to get on board (which helps my cause tremendously 😀).

So, I am on a mission to simplify and minimize, one space at a time. Much like my view on relationships – I am thankful for the things and relationships I have had, but I no longer create a debilitating attachment to either of them. 😀

A.K.

Advertisements