Learning to let go

Have you every had to say goodbye to a close friend?

Have you ever had to part with things that you unknowingly attached sentimental value?

Have you ever had to make the decision to downsize because you have more things than your house can reasonably accommodate?

All of these situations are difficult…at first. But when you realize that the problem is in your perspective alone, it makes it a much simpler problem to overcome.

One of my biggest learning moments was when a friend that I had really connected with at a spiritual level had to leave the country for a new opportunity. It took me about six months to adjust to the change (there was a huge void in my life). I missed her a lot. She was the one friend that just got me. I don’t connect very easily with people at that level, so it hurt. But in the process of adjusting and reflecting on my emotions, I learned that I had gotten too attached to her and the idea of her. I had to accept that the strong connection that we had built would cross all barriers including the physical distance. I had to accept that she was a blessing and that she would always be that special friend. Once I could accept that, it was freeing. Now, I still feel the same connection to her even if we don’t talk for say, a month. I call her my “Soul Sister”. But when we do talk, it’s as though we were never apart!

In many ways, it prepared me for my kids becoming teenagers. You have to accept that they will start developing their own schedules, friends and interests. They won’t always come running to you to give you a big hug when you get home as they did when they were toddlers. This doesn’t mean that they love you any less – it just means the relationship is evolving and looks different. They show their love in different ways. The key is that you need to recognize that and more importantly be secure about that.

Now the easier part. Letting go of “stuff”. I personally don’t get attached to “stuff” and I keep purchases to a minimum but not everyone I know shares the same philosophy. Their choices sometimes leaves me in a situation of saying “Gosh, why do we need so much stuff?”. Seriously, why??!!

It has created more stress for me than pleasure. Long story short…it’s time to let go.

My husband and I watched a very interesting documentary on Netflix called “Minimalism” which really provides a lot of good insight into the benefits of simplicity. That was the trigger that he needed to get on board (which helps my cause tremendously πŸ˜€).

So, I am on a mission to simplify and minimize, one space at a time. Much like my view on relationships – I am thankful for the things and relationships I have had, but I no longer create a debilitating attachment to either of them. πŸ˜€




Who empowers you to be the best you can be?

Is it your employer? Does a company culture automatically translate to empowered employees?

Is it your boss or manager? Do they carve the path for you to “BRING IT!”?

Is it your parents? Did they give to the freedom to explore your own interests and strengths?

Is it your spouse? Does he encourage you to explore and strengthen your individuality?

If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, you have a head start on being empowered.

If you answered “No” to all the questions, fret not…all is not lost.

Although you may get an assist with external sources, true empowerment comes when YOU yourself believe in yourself!

Once you find it within YOURSELF, there’s no stopping you. There is no limit. There no perception of “Rejection” – it is just considered another door closer to SUCCESS!

Once you get here, no one can contain your energy:

No company culture.

No boss.

No parents.

No spouse.


Bottom Line:

Believe, Believe, Believe!


Thank Goodness!

We often get caught up in the mundane aspects of life.

  • Wake up
  • Brush teeth
  • Eat breakfast
  • Go to work
  • Come home
  • Make dinner
  • Chat with family
  • Go to bed
  • Repeat

It’s no wonder we feel stressed out most of the time!

I guess that’s why we say “Thank goodness it’s Friday!”

Knowing that we can actually slow down on the weekend is a pleasant thought.

In all this, we tend to forget about the things that make our lives richer.

So, on the eve of Thanksgiving, I thought I would reflect on some of these things. Perhaps these will resonate with most of you.

Thank Goodness:

  1. I have two loving kids. They never fail to entertain…hormone surges and all. πŸ˜€
  2. I have a supportive husband. He has given me the room to discover myself and experience personal growth.
  3. I have a family that cares. Parents, in-laws, siblings. Life would be so lonely without them.
  4. I have a job. Regardless of challenges that are inherent with most jobs, having financial stability is definitely a plus.
  5. I have the time to stay healthy. The gym is one of my “happy places”!
  6. For GPS. I don’t get lost while driving anymore. πŸ˜€
  7. For Chocolate. Need I say more?


Here’s to taking a little time to focus on the positive things in our lives!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!


Philosophical Math

Math concepts play a part in many aspects of our life today.  We use addition, subtraction, division, multiplication for day to day transactions. We use angles for constructing buildings.  We use proportions for cooking and baking. These are just a few examples showing the practical use of math.

There are some math equations that I have arrived at (based on my personal experiences):

Fulfillment is inversely proportional to Social Media usage 

I have noticed that my social media usage has reduced ever since started  training for a triathlon. This has been one of my most fulfilling “hobbies”.  Perhaps because it has made me stronger, both mentally and physically.  

I usually turned to Facebook or Instagram when I was bored or lonely.  I guess that type of void has been eliminated. I don’t even experience FOMO (Fear of missing out). That would explain why I don’t feel the need to go on Facebook or Instagram multiple times a day.  Once a week seems to cut it.

Unhappiness is proportional to Expectations 

When I started exploring spirituality  a few years ago, this was one of the first lessons that came to light for me.  Maybe another way of phrasing it would be “You can’t be happy if you are a control freak!!”.  Anytime I felt disappointment, I would stop to reflect on the root cause and inevitably it would point to my expectations in a situation.  

This lesson also reformed my parenting style.  I went from a  “My way or the highway” dictator to being more of a trusted guide, advisor and friend.  Don’t get me wrong…Rules are still enforced when needed (we are dealing with teenagers here πŸ˜€).

The Misery Quotient equals pain raised to the power of X

Where X = number of times that a painful incident is remembered, retold or relived.

In other words, the quotient increases exponentially!  Hence we need to let go of things in the past in order to step towards being happy and in the moment. 



Obsession vs. DeterminationΒ 

Speaking from my (limited) experience, training for an athletic event requires a lot of patience, mental strength and determination.

Patience is needed because results are not always instantaneous.

Mental strength is required to get you past the temporary hurdles

Determination is key because this is what keeps you working towards the final goal through the ups and downs.

Although patience and mental strength are important, determination is critical to sustain the interest and hard work needed to train honestly and to the best of your ability.

So when does determination cross over into the darker side i.e “Obsession”?

While determination has more of a positive undertone, obsession is quite the opposite.

Obsession makes the mind restless.  It is almost equivalent to greed where you want something so badly that it consumes you. You stay in a constant state of discontent…desiring a particular end result.  It prevents you from appreciating genuine progress because your mind is clouded with an unrealistic perception of perfection…which in most cases is nothing but a red herring!

So be patient, strong, determined and train on. Let not the small failures discourage you as those are the building blocks to ultimate success!



With power comes responsibility…

This is a famous line from “The Spiderman”.

I drew inspiration from that line to write this post.

With power comes responsibility,

With responsibilty comes stress

With stress comes malaise

With malaise comes unhappiness

With unhappiness comes despair!

What is the price we pay for gaining power?  More importantly, are we willing to live with those consequences?


The sun will rise…again

Inspired by the concept of impermanence.

The sun will set…with beautiful colors…but fret not, for it will rise again

Close friends will move on…leaving you with only memories…but fret not, for there will be many more people to meet 

Relationships will go awry…leaving you confused…but fret not for this will make you grow (wiser and stronger)

Babies will grow up…giving you fewer cuddles and kisses…but fret not for you can enjoy their teenage humor and shenanigans πŸ˜€

You will have a really bad day…making you feel worn out…but fret not for work is only a minor part of your day

You will mess up from time to time…and question your integrity…but fret not for your own forgiveness will give you a new beginning!

Youth will slip away…enter botox?  OMG!!!…fret not for wisdom is the key to eternal happiness (and costs much less!)

The sun will set…in all its glory…but fret not for it surely will rise again!

The point being that sometimes things start to look grim beacuse we so badly want to hang on to a “status quo” where we feel really good.   But if we just understand that this feeling of despair is self-imposed (due to our “attachment” to a situation or thing or person) we will be able to move forward.  The happiness that once was is also around the bend (in the form of a new opportunity)…just make that turn…againπŸ˜€